2003-07-16 - 3:29 p.m.
I don't take the initiative. I am lazy and should get fired. If I wanted to take it, I could really do a lot of stuff here, at work--I could revamp their entire filing system and put the hundreds of pounds of paper files on the computer, I could organize a mass informational mailing, i could try to redesign their website and update their look, I could research alternative ways for the business for get more press, I could ...You know, stuff like that. that no one is going to tell me to do but that would help the business. I don't have to spend all my days on here, on the internet, writing my friends. Are my friends the ones who will get me jobs, who pay me $100 a day for my time? My stupid friends.
Friendster is a website which has a great percentage of people I've met in my life on it. On it are 2 boys who were smart and funny and nice and who I dissed. I get the feeling that I really hurt both of them, Dan and Eric. And who's laughing now? Maybe not them exactly, but not me either. I am just going out on dates with guys who suck worse than they did and at the same dead end job in which i don't live up to my potential. My own brother-in-law is thinking justifiedly of firing me. I wish he would, so my life would hit rock bottom and I could become a herion addict and someone would help me.
